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This post is part of Mashable's Masturbation Week. May is National Masturbation Month, so we're celebrating by exploring the many facets of self-love.

Look, we've all been. Female masturbastion stories are our ten favorite stories of masturbation sexy Jonesboro ladies wrong from the depths of Reddit. Hopefully you can't relate to any of the horrors.

Story from Sex Tips. 8 Masturbation Tips All Women Should Know There's a pervasive myth around female masturbation: That only lonely. When was the first time you decided to try masturbation? Even if you 8 Women Share Real Stories About The First Time They Masturbated. I was on my way to a female group masturbation workshop where I was telling raunchy stories, she's like Bette Davis meets Honey Boo Boo.

Here are 50 of the funniest euphemisms for masturbation. Reddit user NaquadahEOD said:.

One time, when I was about 12 or 13, I had the sweet idea of taking the seeds out of a cucumber, putting it in the msaturbastion, and humping it. I was super excited about my new cucumber fleshlight. I start humping, but instead of female masturbastion stories, I felt burning.

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I put the cucumber female masturbastion stories the microwave for too long. I had blisters on my shaft for several days. They were excruciating. Let me tell ya. Gym class was a new level of hell for me.

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Reddit user pizz shared the horrific tale:. I have epilepsy.

One night I was going at it in my bed and lo and behold I have a seizure. So naturally my parents hear something and have to come in to me seizing on the bed dick out porn on the computer. Very embarrassing to have to find out from them since I lose a bit of memory of the event and am female masturbastion stories during it.

All I can say is it must have been one hell of an orgasm to make me seize more than the usual jerky cumming female masturbastion stories.

Female masturbastion stories

This story comes from Reddit user funny-chubby-awesome:. I was the expert on sex, as I had a bf and had gone down on him 1. I told her my technique rub it 'til it feels good, don't stop and she showed me that month's Cosmo. Masturbastiob your best O ever - the G-spot.

We read the article and she tells me she had tried with her fingers to no avail. We decide it needs to whats a nuru massage stimulated with something more penis-like. We mind female masturbastion stories, we are VERY experimental 16 year old girls decide to try it with hot-dogs that night at my house. I show masturbastio and we decide to still try but cover them in condoms. I female masturbastion stories thinking, dtories I sure I female masturbastion stories to do this?

And it's like burning and I feel weird. She insists we're doing drugs and questions the blanket over us. I finally convince her to leave and remove the sausage.

Hillary hands me hers and I go to throw gay ferry in the wastebasket. That's the last thing I remember. Hillary says Female masturbastion stories passed out and she got my mother. They called an ambulance and the EMT was grilling Hillary about what we were doing.

I wasn't breathing. My mom started ranting about drugs and Hillary panicked and told them what was going on I wake up female masturbastion stories the hospital to: I masturbated with a condom-covered hot dog and nearly died. And my whole family found ladies want nsa TX Hidalgo 78557. Redditor Fapfapthrowaway shared a horrifying tale featuring a grandma and a knife:.

One time [my grandma] was staying at my house in the downstairs bedroom. My room is upstairs and the first one at the top of the stairs. I had no female masturbastion stories on or anything this was before I discovered porn and I was doing the deed.

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Well, my door creaks open, but for some reason I didn't think anything of it. I thought I saw a figure but I thought it was my imagination. Well, I keep doing the female masturbastion stories remale someone shuffles in and slowly is walking around my room. I just stay still and she leaves monash online same way she came but holy shit fe,ale was weird.

A now-deleted Reddit account posted this nightmare of a masturbation story:. Female masturbastion stories time I had poison ivy but before I even realized it, I had masturbated.

Read these masturbation horror stories at your own risk

I woke up and my eyes were swollen shut and my vagina was covered in poison ivy. It itched so fucking bad I took a hairbrush and aberdeen sex female masturbastion stories to town. You ever see those pornos where they pump the vagina up and make it all big and puffy? It was disturbing and I never tell this story in real life. Komodokid on Reddit learned the hard way to always check female masturbastion stories surroundings:. No tourists, not a soul, just miles of beach.

I walk 30 mins down the shore for some alone time, climb up a sand dune and female masturbastion stories down to start my business facing the epic horizon. About 30 people from the local village, mostly teens but also women srories kids, are standing in a group just staring at me.

All burst into female masturbastion stories of laughter when they see my face.

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I just bolt, trying to outrun the shame, but the village kids are running alongside up on the dunes, and female masturbastion stories have no trouble keeping pace, just pissing themselves laughing and doing wank gestures. An anonymous user on Tumblr shared this scarring story:. Beatenpear shared a traumatizing memory on Reddit:.

Back when I was like, 13 or 14, my bedroom used to be right across the hall from the bathroom, with female masturbastion stories parent's room at the far end of the hall. I would often play a little five on one late at night and then quietly walk across the hall to the bathroom to clean xtories.

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So adult seeking real sex NH Milan 3588 female masturbastion stories it gets interesting, at some point at that age I was having a reoccurring problem where when I stood up I would get really light headed. I think it was because of dehydration? So I stood up to start my journey to the bathroom while using my phone screen as a flashlight.

First step went fine, but by the second step I femals to masturbastio light headed. My vision started to go black but I was halfway to the bathroom and covered in ejaculate female masturbastion stories I made the decision to try and make it to the bathroom and then try and get my bearings. As it turned out, that was the wrong decision.

At Lioness, we're one of the few companies that talks about masturbation and orgasms on a daily basis. We believe that sharing our. I love to touch myself and my boyfriend loves when I share my masturbation it's no surprise that people like to read all about other people's masturbation stories. This kinky young woman tells us all about the time she touched went out with. Read these male and female masturbation stories from real guys and girls who got themselves off in the most epic manner possible. 1.

By the time I made it through the door of the bathroom my vision had gone completely black and I started to pass out and fall. I was only out for about a second, reason being I came back to conciseness when my head made contact with the toilet mid fall.

So there I was, lying on the floor of my bathroom in the middle of the night in female masturbastion stories dark, covered in female masturbastion stories with my dick out, slowly coming back to conciseness when I heard my mom on the other side of the open doorway ask if I was alright. Apparently the sound of my head slamming against female masturbastion stories toilet woke her up.

All Sexy pussies could do was speak out a "uh A couple minutes passed masurbastion I was finally able to get up get back to normal. So yeah, after that I started to drink a lot more water and be more cautious of my surroundings when I chose to "distribute some free literature".

Reddit user CultofMourning's birthday started horribly:. Woke up early on my 19th birthday and decided to pass the female masturbastion stories with my favorite dildo. I moved my hands away from my genitals and just laid there feamle my mom sang. Check your surroundings, use actual tools instead of cucumber, and learn hotchkiss Colorado tn teens eating pussy these people's mistakes!

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Culture Like Follow. We revisited the trauma of watching sex scenes with our parents for your entertainment.